when i think about what adam sandler has done to the world my blood boils
That point in a piece of fanfiction where you can tell something embarrassing is about to happen so you start fucking around on tumblr because you’re a huge baby with a crippling overabudance of empathy.
I do this with every media I consume. I pause movies and have to walk around and prepare myself for second-hand embarrassment sometimes.
i just figured out the perfect murder
kill someone and bury them in their own garden
that way if the police find them they’ll think it was a suicide
#welp looks like the victim committed suicide and promptly buried themselves in their garden #how considerate of them
MY DAD JUST FUCKIJNG SENT THIS TO ME AND I;M LAUGHING SO FUCKING HARD
ambedo n. a kind of melancholic trance in which you become completely absorbed in vivid sensory details—raindrops skittering down a window, tall trees leaning in the wind, clouds of cream swirling in your coffee—which leads to a dawning awareness of the haunting fragility of life
Not Another Teen Movie
if you ever want to hear Chris Evans say “that cute little face she makes while she’s tonguing my balls”, justwatch Not Another Teen Movie.
sorry i had to fix that